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We were fortunate when we started to explore the lifestyle to connect with a few couples right away who were very patient, gave us great advice, encouraged and answered any and all of our questions, and even told us some of the questions we didn't know we needed to ask. We assumed most had a similar experience, but it wasn't long before we realized that our experience was unique a lot more often than it was the norm.
We don't want to imagine what our experience would've been like if it weren't for the support we received, and we've heard the stories 😳 from others who weren't as fortunate, took a leap, and hit a lot of rocks on the way down. There just aren't a ton of easy-to-find, credible, cohesive, and comprehensive resources for people who WANT to be prepared and to feel safe asking their questions and having them answered objectively.
We quickly started to meet other newcomers, and decided the "norm" needed to change. We dedicated ourselves to supporting them however we could - as long as they wanted us to. In some cases, experienced swingers can be wary of newcomers. [It's frustrating, but somewhat understandable. Humans tend to dislike gray area, and there's less room for gray area in the lifestyle than just about anywhere else.]
We agreed to be pretty accepting of that gray area, and as we continued to meet newcomers, we offered them a no-pressure space to ask whatever questions they had and/or share what we know that they might be able to learn from. It turns out that this type of space was even more of a need than we anticipated, and our community is now approaching 10k members.
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